The cold has finally popped its ugly head up here on the farm. Wood
is being drug in from the recent downed tree. Still waiting on my husband’s
last bit of money to come from his settlement to get all the rest of the stuff
we need to get ready to build a roof. The red tape is so frustrating. They tell
you one and a half weeks and mean whenever they get around to it. Sad how
government works when you truly need the help. The cold weather will ready make
it hard to get things done in a timely manner. I just wished it was all
finished and the house was all sealed up for the winter.
I have been adding detail to my new office. Painted my chair by
adding a bit of color to it with a peacock. Now I am thinking about a mural for the
wall. I want to feel warm when I am in there working and have some great ideas
to make that happen. I have moved a few plants in to give it a more welcome
look and I brought back my rocker with my massager in too. I am looking for the
perfect rug to go in the middle of it all. As much as I hate rugs I think it
will save the wear and tear on the newly stained floor. I have added
shelving behind my rocker to accommodate a good bit of my art supplies and
other things.
This month is a very hard month to get through as I feel a good bit
older every year since I have reminders with my oldest and youngest children’s
birthdays reminding me of how old I have become. This time of the
year I feel very depressed too for so many reasons. My biggest is not having my
kids close and my heart feels the pain. It isn’t the holidays because I don’t
celebrate them. It is just knowing how I have lost my kids to a far greater fears, the world.
Spring needs to get here soon with sunshine and warmth so I can
get back out and get more going here on the farm and in helping others. New
life and new beginnings. I just pray we all find joy in one another through all
the great things our Grand Creator has blessed us with.
